everything was not what i use to think, it seems like only studies revolve around me now. i feel so cock up that i can't stand it. i really feel stress.i have been really busy recently, can't even find the time to touch my computer. the work i have within was not that much for homeowrk. but it feels like i am suffocating. i really want this to end as soon as posible. i am still dreading on going back to malaysia. can i please don't go? everything seems so mess up, i have been in a emotional unstable road. too much things i do not wanna know or see. too much thinking will hurt my brain. if i look closer to it i am afraid i will fall. everything seems so different from reality in here than what i tried to fake in the real world. stab me, punch me electricfy me i still can't feel a thing. this is so fucking fantastic.
if i scolded any one please put up with me for a little while, i promise to get back as soon as possible.